Rage and Anger

Did you know that anytime you have ever been angry you had the perception of "Something unfair is going on here" first?  Do 1, 2, 3 with anger and you may feel better fast. 

1.     Name the Feeling: Angry
2.      Name the Cause: Something is going on that is unfair to you or someone you care about.
3.      Do a Satisfying Response: Ways to reduce feelings of anger.
 
a)      Check – was it really unfair? If it was fair, that changes your perspective.
-          Give yourself some cool-down time and reassess the situation; it might be fair.
-          Get other’s perspective on the situation.
-          Listen to the other side.
-          Step back and look at the big picture.
-          Were you in a bad mood or tired and being oversensitive?
-          Sometimes, it just is the way it is, and it’s equally unfair to everyone.
 
b)      Make fair. Whenever possible, attempt to regain fairness in the situation.
-          Let people know that it seems unfair to you.
-          Talk to someone in charge and tell them about the situation.
-          Stand up for yourself in a fair and caring way.
-          Join a group that stands up for rights.
-          Join with others that feel like you do and get support in your efforts.
 
c)      Forgive them and move on – real forgiveness reduces the anger.
-          Remember that forgiveness is NOT forgetting what happened.
-          Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you like the person or what they did.
-          Forgiveness has a more positive effect on you than it does on them.
-          Try to understand why they did the unfair thing. This makes forgiveness easier.
-          Realize that most of the time, they wish that they could do better.
-          Forgiveness gives you back your mental and emotional energy for other things.
-          Forgiveness gives you peace of mind when all other things *Taken from Cal Banyan's The Secret Language of feelings book. 
 
*For more information on how you can get deep forgiveness using hypnosis call our office.  Otherwise watch this SHORT VIDEO while you consider it.
 

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